The Weight of It

KinderdijkBalcony
Originally uploaded by SavageWave.

i am finding reasons again
searching under rocks
and climbing ladders
as though the obtuseness
or the height of it
somehow matters

looking out
to discover one more little thing
that will convince me
this tide will go nowhere

i can't be out there
with all those people
'cause they are nowhere with me
i don't think my head is
with the stars
or above the clouds even
it sits squarely on my shoulders
wet with tears

who cried and made me queen?
i look out and see the serf
falling in the field
in that poorest of oceans
and i cannot be seen
beyond this savage wave

in truth, nothing is lacking
you have been weighed
you have been measured
and you have been found
wanting nothing
so where are my reasons
where have all the findings gone?

it is this window from which i look
that frames me
and it is days like these
that tell me i am wrong
to push you under
to deny you moments
and cheat the bitches of fate

Tara Holland

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